If you’ve heard me say this before, you may close this window and come back here again when I post something new. But if you haven’t heard of the day when I decided to cheat on my Statistics exam, read on. You might find encouragement in the lessons I learned that fateful day.

You see, I was never really good in Math. Whenever I see numbers, I get instant headaches. Even before I read the problem, I already make up my mind that it was going to be hard. I would rather be tied in a chair in front of language and history books than stare at numbers in a test paper.

So when I was about to take my final exams in Statistics, I was in a major spiritual crisis. I knew I was going to fail the course and that would be the most embarrassing thing to happen to someone who has been getting the top scores in other subjects like Biology, Chemistry and Zoology. I desperately needed to pass the course and the only option left for me was to cheat.

I still remember the whole setting  vividly in my head. It was late in the afternoon, I was alone in my dorm room profusely sweating as I nervously took my old scientific calculator from the drawer and started scribbling the formulas on the back cover using a Mongol pencil number 1. I sighed a faint prayer of forgiveness while in the background Jaci Velasquez was singing her sweet rendition of “I Get On My Knees.”I didn’t want to listen to the song but I didn’t want to stop my cassette player either.

After I copied the formulas, I neatly tucked the calculator inside my bag and started out of the door when I realized I needed to say at least a little prayer. It was very awkward. How do you ask God to bless your cheating? How do you say “Let me cheat just this one time, I’m sorry, bless me anyway and please don’t hold this against me?”

After so much hesitation, I went back inside, sat in my bed for a minute and mumbled, “Lord… ” Many moments passed and I was still speechless. I just couldn’t form the words. I wanted to just get up and be done with it but part of me was thinking it was the same thing that made Esau lose his inheritance when he sold his birthright for a plate of food.

Jaci Velasquez’s lyrics were ringing in my head. “When I close my eyes, no darkness there; there’s only light… I get on my knees… ”

Slowly, I took the calculator from my bag, ripped the cover apart, dropped it in my study table and went out of the door to face the dreaded numbers in my Statistics exam paper. I was teary eyed as I walked into the exam room, not because I was going to fail but because I felt the spiritual magnitude of my decision and I was so happy I chose to honor Christ that day.

As I quietly settled into my chair, I looked around the quite room to see how my classmates were doing. They had a uniform grim look on their faces. Then something caught my eyes. There on the white board in front of us, in bold letters, I saw the formulas that I wrote on the cover of my calculator. Our professor wrote them there for us.

In case we need them.

So we wouldn’t have to cheat.

I cried.